Rajasthan, with its grand palaces, towering forts, and weddings that could put a Bollywood blockbuster to shame, has always been a place where tradition and extravagance go hand in hand. But every once in a while, a custom pops up that doesn't just make you stop and admire—it makes you stop mid-bite at a wedding feast and go, Wait… what? One such ritual that has recently left people talking (and, in some cases, speechless) is the practice where, on the groom's wedding day, his mother symbolically breastfeeds her grown son in front of family and guests.
For those who uphold this ritual, it's about reinforcing the unbreakable bond between a mother and her son. In certain communities, particularly among the Bishnois, it is considered a mother's final act of care before her son steps into married life. The idea is that no matter how much he grows, he should never forget where he comes from—his mother's love, her sacrifices, and now, this rather unforgettable wedding moment. Some even believe it serves as a reminder that a man's ultimate loyalty should remain with his birth family, because what better way to make that point than by reenacting the earliest act of nourishment in front of a wedding audience?
But for many, especially those unfamiliar with the practice, this is less about sentiment and more about sheer discomfort. Critics argue that while traditions can be meaningful, they also need to make sense in the world we live in today. Watching a grown man being symbolically nursed in front of a gathering doesn't exactly scream "new beginnings" or "mature adult relationship." If anything, it looks more like a mother-son parting scene with an unnecessarily dramatic twist.
Then there's the glaring gender disparity. If this is all about parental blessings, where is the father's equivalent send-off for his daughter? Why don't we see a similar public display of fatherly affection before a bride leaves for her new home? Ah, but that's the thing with tradition—it has a funny way of bending in favor of men while expecting women to quietly comply.
If this doesn't make you rethink how selectively modesty is enforced, what will? A bride is expected to lower her gaze, keep her voice soft, and pull down her ghoonghat in the name of respect, while, just a few feet away, a groom's mother is publicly simulating breastfeeding him, all in the name of tradition. If that doesn't scream double standards, I don't know what does.
Beyond the feminist critique, this ritual also raises a broader question—what does it say about how Indian families view adulthood? In most cultures, marriage is a turning point, a step into independence, but this ritual sends a different message. It subtly reinforces the idea that, despite stepping into married life, the groom remains, in his mother's eyes, a child forever. It's less of a send-off and more of a last-minute reminder that the umbilical cord, at least symbolically, is still very much intact.
And let's be honest, part of the reason this tradition has stuck around could be because it's just that—a spectacle. Indian weddings are meant to be talked about, remembered, and now, more than ever, filmed for social media. Maybe this ritual, odd as it might seem to outsiders, is just another way of making a wedding unforgettable. In a time when every moment is curated for the perfect Instagram reel, who's to say this isn't just another dramatic addition to the wedding playbook?
Culture isn't some ancient relic gathering dust on a shelf—it's meant to evolve, to breathe, to move with the people who keep it alive. Maybe this ritual will slowly fade away, or maybe it will adapt into something else. But one thing's for sure—it has got people talking. And isn't that what traditions are really about? To make us stop for a moment, to make us think about where we've been and where we're headed, and, in the end, to help us decide what's worth holding on to and what we're better off leaving behind.
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