In India, a seemingly innocuous question often carries the weight of societal expectations and cultural norms: "Kitna kamate ho?" or "How much do you earn?" This query, frequently posed by parents, relatives, and even casual acquaintances, reflects a deeply ingrained obsession with financial success as a measure of personal worth and social status.
The fixation on earnings in Indian society has its roots in historical and cultural factors. In earlier times, wealth was measured by land ownership or cattle. Today, salary has become the primary yardstick for success and respect. In a country with a history of economic struggles and a large population competing for limited resources, financial security has become paramount. Parents often see their children's earnings as a reflection of their own success and social standing.
Dr. Ranjana Kumari, a noted sociologist, explains, "In a country with a history of economic struggles and a large population competing for limited resources, financial security has become paramount. Parents see their children's earnings as a reflection of their own success and social standing."
For many Indian parents, a child's salary determines the level of respect they should receive from society. When a son or daughter lands a high-paying job in a multinational corporation, suddenly relatives who never bothered with the family start calling more often. This obsession with earnings extends to the marriage market as well.
Matrimonial websites frequently feature salary ranges as key criteria for potential matches. It's not uncommon for the first question from interested families to be about the prospective bride or groom's "package," reducing individuals to mere numbers. Priya S., a 28-year-old software engineer, shares her experience: "When my parents started looking for a groom, the first question from interested families was always about my package (salary). It felt like I was being reduced to a number."
Many Indian parents view their children's success as an extension of their own. Parents who may not have had the opportunities they dreamed of often place their unfulfilled ambitions on their children. A high-earning child becomes a source of pride and validation, allowing parents to live vicariously through their offspring's achievements. Ramesh Gupta, a 55-year-old father from Delhi, admits, "When my son got a high-paying job in an MNC, suddenly relatives who never bothered with us started calling more often."
The constant comparison with peers and relatives fuels a never-ending rat race. Salaries become a topic of discussion at family gatherings, leading to pressure and anxiety among young professionals. Many dread these functions, knowing they'll face a barrage of questions about their earnings and comparisons with cousins or family friends. Akash Mehta, a 32-year-old banker, recalls, "At every family function, uncles and aunties would compare my salary with my cousins'. It was exhausting and made me dread these gatherings."
However, as India modernizes and younger generations gain exposure to global perspectives, there's a gradual shift in attitudes. Millennials and Gen Z are increasingly prioritizing job satisfaction, work-life balance, and personal growth over just high salaries. Some are leaving high-paying corporate jobs to start their own companies or pursue passion projects, much to the initial skepticism of their parents.
The "Kitna kamate ho" culture in India reflects deep-seated societal values and historical contexts. While financial security remains important, there's a growing recognition of the need for a more holistic approach to measuring success and worth. As India continues to evolve, so too may its obsession with salaries, potentially paving the way for a more balanced view of personal and professional accomplishments.
In the end, the question "Kitna kamate ho?" is about more than just a number. It's about respect, social standing, and perceived success in a rapidly changing society. As India moves forward, it will be interesting to see how this cultural obsession adapts to new realities and values.
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